A Lot Can Happen in Three Weeks

Completely paralyzed people can learn ways to communicate.
A bacterium can celebrate its 600,000th birthday.
Bigfoot can get the Lindsay Lohan treatment.
Ants can teach us how not to panic.
We can all vote for the Seven Fortean Wonders of the World.
Those fearful of the word moist can have their day in the sun.
A German teen can take that Cuarto de Tula song from the Buena Vista Social Club a little too seriously.
A group of clowns can stymie a white-power hate group.
The soviets can get a bit uncomfortably freaky with their commemorative art.
Driving while talking on the cell phone can actually be, maybe, not so bad.
Airports can build some very strange runways.
We can all now search Wikipedia for incriminating anonymous edits from corporate IP addresses.
A new coinage can rival spam for inbox domination.
Fifties housewives can wax the linoleum.
China can regulate reincarnation.
Science musicians can create a glissando that is an aural illusion.
A Massachusetts behavior-modification school can convince parents to electroshock their kids.
You can make yogurt by adding milk to the little bit of yogurt you have left over.
Uniformed back-up dancers can make anything rock.
The universe can encompass a billion-light-year void.
Spiders can turn on you if you keep them as pets.
Picture-based instructional pamphlets can explain anything.
One can flip a misspelled eBay collectible for hefty profits.
Keywords in a country's official name can correlate with its democracy quotient.
Stars can have huge tails, like comets.
Vampire bats can pick cows over tapirs.
Burning Man can suffer an early incineration.
New vodkas can spring up like dandelions while rums and gins stay traditional.
Caffeine can boost grandma's memory.

Feedreader, you and I had a lot of catching up to do.