Shower Mildew Spells Out Messages for Rhode Island Man

According to ever-reputable source the Weekly World News, thirty-year-old Robert Malcolm of Providence felt his filthy lifestyle and nonexistent cleaning habits were vindicated when he discovered that the mildew growing between his shower tiles was communicating with him by spelling out English words:

"It was mildew," he said. "Not unusual for my shower, I guess; but it seemed to spell out 'have a good day.' I thought 'what an amazing coincidence,' and I decided to take a picture when I got home from work."

. . . .

"This time it was, 'Hope work went well,' and there was a smiley face below the words," said Malcolm. "The mildew in my apartment was definitely trying to communicate with me."

. . . .

"The stain is alive, and sentient, and obviously grateful I haven't tried to kill it. I think it's developing a bond with me."

Link. What's really surprising is that the mildew hasn't spelled out a more appropriate message: